Thursday, December 23, 2010

How then to live...

... was the question, in the space there is?

I'm scarcely qualified to answer, but at odd moments, now and then, in a state either of ignorant hubris or utterly undeserved blessing, possibly both, certainly blessing, certainly undeserved,  I think perhaps I get an inkling.  So I've answered it anyway.  It's here, my response to Joe's last in the 'Questions' series at the Compasses blog.

What did I do to deserve the most trusted and trustworthy, respectful but no-shit critical reader and friend, who never makes me feel small or patronised, but can say 'you could...' and I say 'but I don't want to' and he says, 'don't then, but read it so and see' and I do and it really is better, so I change it and feel better for it.  I don't want prescriptive, judgemental, edgy writing groups, on or off-line, I don't want poetry as a contact sport, I don't want to call myself a poet, though I wouldn't mind having what it takes to be one, but I'm joyful and thankful for what I've got, and how.

And what did I do to make a real poet friend, even an ocean away who I've never seen, whose poems are luscious and heartbreaking and full of vivid juice and feeling and complexity, who tells me she wants one of my blue photos to go on the cover of her next collection?

What did I do to to deserve a yes when I feared a no?

What did I do to deserve any of it?  Nothing, and that's not self-abasement or little me or fishing for compliments, really.  It's just a deep and grateful wonder at my good luck at how things are.

I'll try to get one more post up before Christmas.

7 comments:

Rouchswalwe said...

Sweet Lucy, I've been reading your stuff for a while now. What I like is the images your words plant in my mind the first time through. Then I go drink an ale and let things settle. When I come back later for another reading, the images fill out and connect ... thank you for sharing your world in verse!

Fire Bird said...

who's the poet? your blue photos are ace!

Lucy said...

thanks girls.

FB, it's Teresa, I've put a link in now. She hasn't got a huge amount on-line, some at Comstock and one at Qarrtsiluni, I don't know where else. I've got her last couple of books, really gorgeous stuff.

Barrett Bonden said...

I'll get back to the poem in the fulness of time.

Yesterday I posted a piece that reflected, with some wonder, at how blogging has exposed me to a whole range of new pleasures so late in life. And my gratitude to those who have crated these pleasures. I polished and polished and... deleted. Too sentimental. Verse perhaps at a later date. You may ask why you deserve such a no-shit critical reader and I could tell you but I won't. Can't risk sentimentality on that either. But I will say it isn't down to luck.

Barrett Bonden said...

Crated - as in boxed up, preparatory to despatch.

Zhoen said...

Blessings come and go, to be treasured, not measured.

HKatz said...

It's just a deep and grateful wonder at my good luck at how things are.
That's the best attitude to take; to take nothing for granted. Have a warm, happy holiday and a good year to come, full of yet more treasures to take delight in.