Let's get that skirting board job done at last! cries my mate, and before I know it, he's doing it. We pull out the shelves, and I'm turfing out the drawers and box files. How much room we will make! But soon it is apparent that creating space by tidying is like the thrifty measures of cost-cutting that those who seek to govern us promise will finance all manner of wonderful new things elsewhere; there comes a point when it can only be achieved by painful ruthlessness, and is that what we really want? And I find myself shoving things back into holes rather than make the decision to throw them out. and that's usually the point when I say 'Bother spring cleaning!' and go off to mess about in boats.
And it's doubtless what has happened in previous years to these couple of items. This is a scan of an amazing capture Tom made with the old Canon film SLR we used to have, when we had an old rope washing line outside the back door, and the swallows used it as a stopping off point.
Do you remember the days before the internet, when the office or staff room photocopier served to circulate things considered edifying or entertaining? Do I remember the days when I frequented an office or staff room? Only just. This one I've kept around as it makes me chuckle every spring, so I'll give it a new lease of on-line life.
New courses are available to heighten the need for human resources development appropriate to the challenges needed for the 21st century.
S110 - Creative Suffering
S111 - Overcoming Peace of Mind.
S112 - Ego Gratification through Violence.
S113 - Whine Your Way to Alienation.
S114 - Guilt without Sex
S115 - Feigning Knowledge - a career advancement strategy
S116 - Keeping Facts out of your Management Structure.
S117 - Carrying a Piece of Paper whilst Walking Briskly.
S118 - Effective Stupidity.
S119 - Discovering Clockwatching
S120 - How to Appear Interested
S121 - The Art of Problem Making
BUSINESS AND CAREER COURSES
BC10 - Money Can Make You Rich
BC11 - Packaging, Marketing and Selling your Child
BC12 - How to Profit from your Own Body
BC13 - The Under-achiever's Guide to Very Small Business Opportunities.
BC14 - Tattooing your Colleagues as an Income Supplement.
BC15 - Credit Purchasing with your Kidney Donor Card
BC16 - Stressed for Success
BC17 - Indecision - Which Way Now?
FITNESS AND HEALTH
FH10 - The Joys of Hypochondria
FH11 - High Fibre Sex
FH12 - Skate your Way to Regularity
FH13 - The Repair and Maintenance of your Virginity
FH14 - Optional Bodily Functions
FH15 - Baked Beans and the Contortionist
FH16 - Standing up to Haemorrhoids
FH17 - Preventative Self-abuse
FH18 - Nasal Hair in the 21st century
CR10 - Bonsai your Pet
CR11 - Needlecraft for Junkies
CR12 - Drawing Genitalia in Soft Pastel Shades (Spring term only)
CR13 - Orchestrated Flatulence Appreciation
CR14 - Making Others Panic
CR15 - Enhancing Others' Reputations
CR16 - Introduction to Backstabbing
CR17 - Recycling Bodily Waste
HOME ECONOMICS COURSES
HE10 - Cultivating viruses in the Home Refrigerator
HE11 - Sinus Drainage in the Open Plan Office
HE12 - Khmer Rouge cookery for Beginners
HE13 - Advanced Dandruff Sculpture
HE14 - Interesting Bathroom Fungi
HE15 - Indentifying Toilet Smells.
Ok, some of them were pretty tastelss or oherwise not very funny, but it's a quick and easy blog post, and that's two sheets of A4 that can go for recycling and their contents saved for posterity, which will make room for some other treasure.
Off to find some fresh bracken for the lair now...