tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post7381193685014389867..comments2023-10-31T15:39:09.651+01:00Comments on box elder: Summer ghazalLucyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09764296105901909328noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-23085453971850472172008-07-05T22:30:00.000+02:002008-07-05T22:30:00.000+02:00this is lovely, very summery, I especially like th...this is lovely, very summery, I especially like the fistful of goldfinches - one of my favourite birds, very summery! I'm really enjoying writing ghazals too - I'll look out for your two in the ghazal page - I'll have one there too!Crafty Green Poethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02486633917197181851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-44421909527498569482008-06-28T22:53:00.000+02:002008-06-28T22:53:00.000+02:00How interesting - I've never heard of this before....How interesting - I've never heard of this before. It sounds a bit complicated. What's a monorhyme, I wonder? (must look it up). Anyway, lovely words, very evocative.Pam https://www.blogger.com/profile/12641269043817163165noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-78882026967846957482008-06-28T02:31:00.000+02:002008-06-28T02:31:00.000+02:00Summer has so much to offer, and you've highlighte...Summer has so much to offer, and you've highlighted many of these things with style.Stan Skihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11963655096635414472noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-67549347095756249582008-06-28T00:43:00.000+02:002008-06-28T00:43:00.000+02:00L. I can feel the heat and hear the birdsong. Than...L. I can feel the heat and hear the birdsong. Thankyou for explaining the poetry form, new to me. I do like the idea too, of putting your name in the last few words.herhimnbrynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01182397064631016552noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-26856759498413854452008-06-27T22:53:00.000+02:002008-06-27T22:53:00.000+02:00Lucy - thanks for this. Your Ghazal is full of atm...Lucy - thanks for this. Your Ghazal is full of atmosphere and tunes into the mood of Summer so well. Your final stanza is a fine maqta - the world and the poet placed in a balance of mood and nature.Lucashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07642126053527835870noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-71874868658121770392008-06-27T07:33:00.000+02:002008-06-27T07:33:00.000+02:00Ooo..that's how we get our 'ghazal' in Malay langu...Ooo..that's how we get our 'ghazal' in Malay language. Ghazal here means a type of music played with string instruments; they came from Arab land together with Islam thousands years ago..(originally the natives here were Hindus). It consists of very poetic songs but deemed too slow for younger generations now. A lot of effort is being done to conserve it at the moment, before it slowly dies. I'm not one of them who enjoy it either..being not poetic myself..HLizahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04501423875033391870noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-56131893677439462612008-06-27T04:26:00.000+02:002008-06-27T04:26:00.000+02:00was recently introduced to the form as well... but...was recently introduced to the form as well... but got lost in the idea somehow... reading yours it is so very rich and beautiful... a soothing caress of words if there is such a thing... you followed the form in such a way got lost in the story and forgot the form... glad i stopped by...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-43429131707396578812008-06-26T20:26:00.000+02:002008-06-26T20:26:00.000+02:00Oh dear, let's forget about the "guzzle" bit . . ....Oh dear, let's forget about the "guzzle" bit . . . and think "gauze" and "gazelle," instead.<BR/><BR/>I like the description of the "dalliance" bit, though. Emaciated camel, indeed.<BR/><BR/>Your rumination on poetry forms is very interesting, too.Beehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02375981493145612394noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-66619896419373830422008-06-26T19:56:00.000+02:002008-06-26T19:56:00.000+02:00I'll follow the links and learn more about this fo...I'll follow the links and learn more about this form - your work is lovely. And, surely, summer is the only season that wanes suddenly and obviously - imho.Tumblewords:https://www.blogger.com/profile/04279038951489894119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-40309891001006205032008-06-26T18:17:00.000+02:002008-06-26T18:17:00.000+02:00Sweet talkin' - thank you. The crow flew over as I...Sweet talkin' - thank you. The crow flew over as I was sitting ouside in the evening writing and made just tht noise, not a raucous, cawing sound at all, quite gentle!<BR/><BR/>Plutarch - it seems there often is some word play on gazelle within the poems, both words being of Arabic origin and very similar, and there are references to the sad cry of the hunted animal at bay. Have a look at the Page if you've the time, it really is quite intriguing, though there's a danger sometimes of it seeming over-contrived in order to work out the form.<BR/><BR/>JZR - thank you!Lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09764296105901909328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-5099441267989490772008-06-26T17:52:00.000+02:002008-06-26T17:52:00.000+02:00Whatever it might be called, Lucy, it's mighty fin...Whatever it might be called, Lucy, it's mighty fine writing!! Thanks!!jzrhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05938966640494785871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-57333634921792356152008-06-26T17:31:00.000+02:002008-06-26T17:31:00.000+02:00I must come back to this. Thank you for your intro...I must come back to this. Thank you for your introduction to the form, and to the delicious modern example of it which you have given us. I think of gazelle, when wondering how to pronouce it even though it could not be right, but the words do tend to run and leap like one.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06972049290586377462noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-39586071155970288082008-06-26T17:05:00.000+02:002008-06-26T17:05:00.000+02:00Yeah, I feel this poem, you put so much into it - ...Yeah, I feel this poem, you put so much into it - <BR/>And I love the 'Kew, kew, kew.'Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-89521221892498404492008-06-26T14:24:00.000+02:002008-06-26T14:24:00.000+02:00Rosie, that's quite amazing that you sang my poem!...Rosie, that's quite amazing that you sang my poem! I often think I would probably write better poems if I were musical. As you sing ragah, I'm sure the sung ghazal would be possible for you. There is apparently a site about it, specifically in Urdu, which I've not got round to exploring yet. The wistfulness is quite appealing. I'm not sure I would be much good at writing for music, but it would certainly be breaking new ground to do a disc of original sung ghazals in English, it could be the making of us...Lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09764296105901909328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-4197581857445822462008-06-26T07:47:00.000+02:002008-06-26T07:47:00.000+02:00I hear a quiet wistfulness and the sadness of tran...I hear a quiet wistfulness and the sadness of transience. Summer so lush and so brief. It sounded good when I sang it with my breakfast coffee. Shall we do a disc together? It made a nice change from the blues.Rosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12211663940952195703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-18778558075309939282008-06-26T07:15:00.000+02:002008-06-26T07:15:00.000+02:00Bless you,Bee dear, for responding so thoughtfully...Bless you,Bee dear, for responding so thoughtfully to this! <BR/><BR/>Unfortunately, I feel, the word is pronounced similarly to 'guzzle', I think I prefer to say it how it looks! The dalliance was because it was a love poem, originally a section of a longer poem about travelling far from home, missing your girlfirend and lamenting the emaciation of your camel!<BR/><BR/>Interestingly (well I think so, but I'm in danger of becoming boring about this), in modern Arabic poetry, free verse has overtaken formal verse, and a ghazal is simply a love poem. The Persian forms and influence in other languages has led to the form being more what defines it, while for some poets in English, notably Adrienne Rich, it is the autonomy of the couplets, and the free imaginative association that enables, which make the ghazal interesting. <BR/><BR/>It seems to me perhaps there is a resurgence of interest in formal poetry in the west, while apparently cultures whose tradition was formerly more rigid are now tending towards free verse, but I don't really know enough to substantiate this!Lucyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09764296105901909328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37070024.post-83333937198759724902008-06-26T00:09:00.000+02:002008-06-26T00:09:00.000+02:00I wish that I had a Persian handy, just to speak t...I wish that I had a Persian handy, just to speak the word "ghazal" to me.<BR/><BR/>Does the dalliance bit refer to the poet's relationship with the language . . . or the intense longing aspect of it all?<BR/><BR/>I got a very intense sense of midsummer from your ghazal . . . more melancholy, I think, than the feeling of longing. (Although there is something about longing that has a whiff of the melancholy.) The impression that I received, so strongly, is of the moment when we feel summer start to "turn" . . . even at its height, it is starting to wane. Always a bit sad for those in northern climes . . .Beehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02375981493145612394noreply@blogger.com